I cannot find my penis.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
he fucked my hip out of place.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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