mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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