I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
