He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
