It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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