I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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