How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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