it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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