You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Randomize
