just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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