It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
