kristin has been a bad kristin
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
