I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
