More tranny stories later!
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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