North Korea, Best Korea!
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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