love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize