so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
