yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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