oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Floor bacon is actually really good
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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