Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
