I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I heard we made out
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Randomize
