i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
