I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
