her vagine was all disorganized.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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