Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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