I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
