butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
