Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
