Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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