I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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