That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
