I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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