Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Randomize
