it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
