We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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