i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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