I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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