that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
