Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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