I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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