I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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