So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
