Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
