I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
