Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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