He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
