This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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