Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
smell my finger.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
