The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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