your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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