Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
