Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
worst night to have a conscience
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
