I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
